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[老师已改] 托福写作——[综合+独立][TPO1]第一次写,希望能得到详细的批改和建议

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发表于 2016-5-7 20:29 |显示全部楼层
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Question: Summarise the points made in the lecture, being sure to explain how they cast doubt on specific points made in the reading passage..
In the lecture ,the speaker has opposite points about the essay.
Firstly,essay thnks that four days work will increase companises\\\' profits beacuse four-dant employees would only be paid 80 percent of the nomal rate,and so that we can hire more people to have jobs,so that we can increase conpanises profit,but in the lecture sht speaker don\\\'t think so.He points that if peopel only work 4 days a week ,that means we need more employees to finishi our jobs ,more people means need more computers more trainting and something else which spend more moeny.
Secondly,four-days work will let people make fewer costly wrrors in their work,and it a good way to increase effecive.But speaker point out that there are not engouh time to finish their jobs and when sencond person to hand on the job it will lost more time and the job will make more errors .
Finally,four-day work means people have more time to spend with thier families,friends or pursuing private intersts which can inprove their quality of live.But,less money to earn,many job\\\'s errors need to fix out who have emontion to do anything else?Actually it let our lief qualitise decrease,and this is what the speaker think about.



Question:
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
At universities and colleges, sports and social activities are just as important as classes and libraries and should receive equal financial support.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
   At universities there are many activities like sports,social activities and libraies ,should the receive equal finacial support?Abusolutely they should!
   Though these activitise and libraies not a normal classes for us ,but it is as impotant as normal classes.In classes ,we learn knowleges,our professor will teach us many experience or knwleges,but is just  knowleges not realisty.And in these activities,we learn  experience we are not just talking about it but do it which is very important for our study.There activities do the same things as the nomal classes do but they don\\\'t have any financial support ,it is not unfair.
   Secondly as we said before,these activites is a part of our studies ,and libraies also our teachers in someways ,like they can teach ue how to use the libraian\\\'s computer how to find reserch our books quiekly and so on.When they do some thing for ue like the teachers do in classes just changing the ways,we should pay them the equal money back.
    Finally,hold these activities need money but where wo can find money?Asking people to donate?Finding someone who likes vilunteer to help them?Not enough!They need financial support,they need this money to hold a greatly and interesting active.We benifite from these activites and libraies and the activities\\\' members spend their time to do this,so why  they can not rceive equal financial suppor ?



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发表于 2016-5-7 20:54 | 小站托福TPO客户端

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发表于 2016-5-10 16:26 |显示全部楼层
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发表于 2016-5-10 16:28 |显示全部楼层
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